I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
