either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
