I'm really into asian looking animals
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
