it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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