All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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