do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
