Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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