it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
