Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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