you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
