I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
