"it" just moved
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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