..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
