ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
