Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize