Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
