I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
