Grow some girl-balls and come out already
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
