Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize