I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
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