i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
