i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
