uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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