Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
