just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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