If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
