Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
