i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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