Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
