Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just had sex on a roof
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
