Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
