what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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