yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
