i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
