Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Randomize
