found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
