good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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