it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize