She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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