If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
