That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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