How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize