used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Oh god it's open bar.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
