I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
