It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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