I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
