im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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