Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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