Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
