If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
