addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
