Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
